I'm addicted to Vaping. What can I do?
It’s a warm Thursday, our session on Vaping has come to an end, the music for lunch break piping through the overhead speaker and a handful of keen students make a dash for the nearest exit. As the students file past, there’s a few “Thanks for coming”, “That was really good.” and “I learnt alot” comments and then those that make eye contact and smile their thanks.
A Teacher stops for a moment and shares some of the challenges she’s come up against with the young people, asks me more pointed questions on information she’s been told by students and how she now feels more confident to have conversations with them based on facts and evidence. In the background 3 students are on my radar, they’re hanging back, appearing deep in conversation on the surface, but taking surreptitious looks our way. The teachers clicks too and says goodbye, with a nod in the students direction and a departing smile that says “Good Luck”
The students approach one male and two female. The young man starts the conversation about how he has friends that have been vaping. He queries if there is an impact on him if he’s in an enclosed room with them whilst they vape? We discuss the Second andThird-hand vaping aspects of the presentation and the light goes on in his eyes “I’m not going to be around them while they are vaping anymore.” He makes a little more conversation and realises the others want to talk privately so say’s his goodbyes and leaves us alone together.
One of the students rushes forth with “I had no idea that the vapes impact the people around them. I vape and when you shared about the second hand vaping, I looked at my best friend and she looked at me and it has made me want to stop, because she doesn’t vape and I don’t want to hurt her. I’ve tried to stop before but I went back to it, but now I really want to.” Her friend said “Yes I’ve tried to get her to stop before but it’s really hard for her.” The more we talk the more she opens up about what’s been going on in her life and the simple choice to do something, that she knew her mum would not like, has led to an addiction that is going to be quite difficult to overcome.
This is the reality many of our young people face when they try to stop vaping and realise they have a very real addiction. Whilst the vape technology was developed with good intentions, to help people cease smoking, we now know, just how addictive they are and the suppliers have known for some time, it’s about addiction for profit aimed at our children, but that’s a whole other blog for that one.
So what do you do if you know someone’s addicted but perhaps they don’t realise it yet; and then what can they do to overcome the life controlling issue if they choose to? Lets explore the two factors to these questions:
What can you do if you’re engaging with young people you think may be at risk?
Education - stay educated on the latest evidence and facts so you are prepared for conversations. This doesn’t mean you have to research for hours but stay in touch, even just basic understanding is a start than none when faced with a situation.
Be open and make no assumptions - have open conversations with young people seeking their understanding on vaping and encouraging conversation. If you haven’t seen hard evidence (ie you’ve caught them vaping) but have suspicions then be mindful to not accuse, although you will know your young person really well, sometimes our fear can change our perception of reality and then sometimes your intuition is bang on. Openess to talk encourages self-reflection and disclosure.
Non-judgmental - being aware of when judgmental attitude can colour a conversation and avoiding that, will greatly increase trust and reduce the “wall going up” with a young person
You can’t “fix” it - understand a person will make their own choices and ultimately reap their own consequences both good and bad. There is not one thing you can say or do that will fix the situation. However having conversations based on facts can help that person within their decision making process, whether that’s right now, months or years down the track.
Don’t embellish - everything is available on the internet. If you are making a statement then make sure its factual and you can back it up. Over exaggerating risks or harms (don’t get me wrong they are significant where vaping is concerned) will lose trust. Pointing someone to the evidence is helpful (bookmark some of those articles/papers on your phone in preparation)
Keep the feedback to the behaviour/health impact - if you’re noticing changes in the person then ensure all your feedback is reinforcing your genuine care and concern for them and focusing on the issue not them as a person. If we tell them they’re “bad” or “we thought they were smarter than this” for example, once again we’re going to lose trust and the walls go up. Switch it out to something like “I really care about you and I’ve noticed you’re not as active as you usually are and there’s this throat clearing thing. How are you actually feeling? What do you think might be causing this? I’d like to help you get back to your healthier self”
Seek Help - You can help this person as a support person and cheer them on through their successes and help pick them up in their lows, but the reality is sometimes you need some professional help. So helping them make connections with Health Professionals is always a good thing as part of the journey. GP’s, Counsellors, Quit Programs, Nurses etc is a good start. They can then help you and the young person navigate the recovery journey ahead.
What can I do to quit Vaping?
Acceptance - understanding and accepting you have a life controlling issue is not an easy thing for people to do. It’s easier to look at others and deflect, at how much worse they are than you. It’s also less painful to push people you care about away and deny you have a problem, than let them think you’re not perfect or have a problem. The reality none of us are perfect and we ALL make wrong choices at some point in our life.
Accountablity - the reality is that our choices within a life controlling issues have not been great and it is highly likely that we’ve hurt some people along the way. It’s time to take ownership of this and understand how our actions have impacted those we love. This can be painful and in some instances we’ve really damaged trust with them so our relationship is difficult. However it’s not the end story, in some cases we can rebuild that trust and by being accountable for our actions with these people from now on, starting with an apology and that you are now taking steps to overcome your life controlling issue is a great start. We have to understand though, sometimes people won’t forgive us, even when we’ve done the hard yards and overcome our issues, that’s ok, we forgive them and move forward, their action is on them now not you.
Support - accepting and taking responsibility is awesome, now the next step is understanding this is going to be a tough journey, but be assured it is going to be the best decision you will make to move forward in your recovery. Ever heard the phrase “A problem shared is a problem halved”? Nothing is truer than when you are trying to overcome a life controlling addiction. It’s time to start talking to people you trust and who truly care about you through the next stages. But a word of warning not everyone is going to be equipped to understand the situation or what to do, so there may be a few people involved in this step. You’ll need someone in your corner that you can call when temptation is strong - this could be someone that has gone through this before themselves or just has time to invest in you, a parent, best friend, grandparent, family friend etc. Then you’re going to need a professional, someone trained in this area - a good place to start may be your family GP/Medical Professional, School Wellbeing Team/Nurse/Chaplain, if they aren’t trained they will have their finger on the pulse for local support for you. Counsellors are great people to help you talk through the process of recovery, remember if you don’t feel like your connecting after a few sessions with the counsellor someone links you with, you can request another one, we’re all unique and sometimes personalities don’t click, don’t give up on the process.
Influences - the statement “Show me your friends and I’ll show you your future” is one we use a lot in our rehab centres and it’s so true. The people we surround ourselves with are who we reflect in ourselves and who we grow more to be like. In many ways this is a good thing, people with positive values and behaviours are inspirational. Sometimes we don’t feel so great in ourselves and we don’t connect or feel like we aren’t worthy to be hanging around those types of people. So we migrate to people whose choices and behavious may not be the best for us or themselves, but we feel better about ourselves in their company. Take the time to examine who you are hanging around, the reason you’re with them. If you are engaging in behaviour like Vaping with them and today said “I’m quitting” what would they do? Would they accept that? Try to help you by not Vaping around you anymore? Come with you to talk to someone about your issue? or Would they try to convince you to keep Vaping? Make fun of or ridicule you? Not be friends with you anymore? If you’re serious about your recovery then you need to have positive, supportive influences around you. It’s time to be real, sometimes you’ve got to make the painful decision to leave people that are not healthy to be around behind and you could lose friends. The good news is even though this will be a painful transition, the healthier you and the great people that will want to support and be around you in the long run, will far outweight the negative and pain in the short term.
Triggers - usually we have associations with our life controlling issue with a situation, people or environment. We’ve already discussed people in the point above, now let’s look at other triggers. Take Vaping for example, we might have believed that vaping helps with anxiety or stressful situations and so when we feel nervous we hit the Vape to calm down. Understanding our triggers is important because we can plan ahead what to do at those times. In this example if we get nervous instead of reaching for the Vape, we can go for a walk, focus on breathing techniques, do 10 star jumps, step into the sunshine, close our eyes and focus on the noises around us for 2 mins or talk to a support person just as starters. Leaving groups on Facebook that are associated with Vaping or stop watching YouTube or TickTok on Vaping can help during your recovery. Talk to your support about your Triggers as you recognise them and together work out strategies to overcome these situations.
Habits - are hard to break. Just pulling your vape out of your pocket and bringing it to your mouth and hitting, stimulates the reward centres in our brain which in turn is hard wiring a habit in your brain. Good news is, we can retrain our brain and unlearn habits. To start with throw out all your vapes and switch it out with something else, kind of similar in size to your Vape, maybe a Chupa Chup, Tic Tacs, Licorice Root or carrot sticks reach for these instead. As you progress extend the times between reaching for the replacement and before long you’ll find the desire and cravings will lessen, you will overcome this. (Note: if you’re at school make sure the teachers know why your sucking on a Chupa Chup now before you start). Switching to a physical exercise like a walk, jog, push ups, climbing stairs etc at the time of craving can release “feel good” neurotransmitters in our brain that help us in a healthy way.
Be Kind & Celebrate - Don’t get too hard on yourself if you have a slip up or regress, whilst some people can just quit cold turkey and succeed, it’s normal for some people to have a slip up. What’s important is what you do next, be accountable for your slip to someone and start over, don’t give up on yourself, you are worth more than that and you can succeed. Celebrate the little successes too, you don't have to wait for the big ones. Work out some rewards with your support and kick them into action when you reach your goals.
These are just some tips to help you or someone you know in this space and by all means is not an exhaustive list. There’s plenty of support available in our communities which we mentioned earlier like your GP, School Wellbeing Coordinator, School Nurse, Chaplain or School Counsellor and even online. Here’s some National connections that could be a great start:
Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800
Quitline 13 78 48
At the end of the day you’re pretty amazing and you deserve a great life. Ensuring your health is good, helps support you in that future you want for yourself. Life will throw challenges at us, sometimes we make the right choices and sometimes we don’t. Some of those poor choices result in consequences that aren’t great, but our past does not have to define our future. We are only one good choice away from overcoming the hard stuff. So if something like vaping is in your life right now, make today the day you make that positive choice for your best life and reach out for some help.
NotEvenOnce Projects educate young people, parents, teachers and community members in the Alcohol and other Drug arena. If you would like more information you can always check out our website. On the website you will also see a chat function (via Messenger) if you’d like to connect with someone to talk. This is not manned 24/7 however, so if it’s urgent we’d suggest one of the helplines mentioned in the article, but if you have a little time we will be able to be back to you somewhere within 24hrs through this function.
